The quickest way to drive some people insane is to have music playing ’round the clock. Those people should never live with me. Ever since i can remember, I’ve listened to music everywhere: work, the car, while I’m falling asleep, while I’m in the shower. I’ve got stereo equipment installed everywhere in my house, in my car, and now an iPod.

You might say I kinda like music. You might also say that Bush has been one of the worst things to happen to our country, or that rectal prolapse sounds like a really bad way to spend a Sunday afternoon in spring. In all cases, you’d be making understatements of the grandest degree.

I try to share this love with other people as often as possible. Ben over at helluvablog recently asked, “Has anyone ever seen god and Kenn in the same room?” after I turned him on to a few new bits of music (I will note that this time I didn’t have to pay anyone for the compliment, and that no, no one has ever seen me and god in the same room). He calls me a “musical savant,” though honestly I prefer to think of myself as a “musical pimp.” Because I promote my wares tirelessly, I sometimes beat the equipment when it’s not working hard enough, and I have this fat-daddy diamond studded cane.

Here’s your Thursday treat, a few things to swing by iTunes and check out throughout your long and painful workday. As Mozart might say, eine kleine nacht musik — or as we say here in Alabama, “Turn that shit down, man! I cain’t hear mah Skynyrd!”

If there is one band that has radically affected the way I listen to music — well, Porcupine Tree would be it if so many others hadn’t beaten them to the races. But that’s not their fault — they aren’t as old as Queen, or Steve Vai, or so many others.

They are, however, the best thing to come along into my CD collection in years. You’ve got a bit of Pink Floyd (the atmospherics, and a very British sensibility), a bit of early King Crimson — I think that, outside of Devin Townsend, PT have nailed the idea of cinematic music better than anyone ever could. This is music for surround sound, for driving through unfamiliar areas at night, for snowstorms and wakes. It’s music for whatever you want it to be.

If you dig experimental prog, their earlier stuff is really good, but I find myself returning to this, Deadwing, and Recordings most of all.

If you haven’t heard me rail and rant and speak obsessively and stalker-like about Devin Townsend, then either you’ve never read a word I’ve written, you’ve never met me, or you are deaf. If it’s the third in the series of choices, you’re kinda out of luck. But if it’s the first two — by god, man, get thee to a record store or Amazon nearest yourself! NOW!

Devin is one of the truly alternative, independent minds in music today. He’s been called a mad genius, and I’ve got to agree. His music is equally beautiful and angry, emotive and technical. evolution is a bit more radio-friendly, but Terria is the best from start to finish – particularly Canada, Fluke, and Tiny Tears. Cinematic, as much as PT, but maybe even moreso — three years later, I can still find something new in every song among the layers.

This will come as a shock to some people that know me. On the one hand, I love female vocals — I’ve always been a huge fan of Poe, Drill, Lacuna Coil, Alison Krauss — across the map. And Maria’s voice is no different — she’s got quite possibly the most seductive voice I’ve ever heard. It’s not as much sexy (that vote goes to either Sia or Justine Frischman) as much as, I dunno — beautiful, a siren’s call. I hear most music, and it stirs a lust in me; with Maria, I fall in love.

The shock will come from the style of music — this is far too “college rock” to fit into what I would normally listen to… Alterna-twee… Fuck, I can’t keep up with the lingo you hip kids are using today. Suffice to say that the music here is a cornucopia of styles, but all of it is topped with Maria’s angel voice, and that makes it all okay. Better than okay, even. It’s Marialicious.

And just for Ben, something that I haven’t recommended before: a little guitar hero worship. Hey, it’s better than jukebox hero worship, no?

Racer X guitarist Gilbert is a shredder, sure — and there’s plenty of that here — but he’s also a great pop artist. Look, he covered “Dancing Queen” live, and even put out a version of “2 Become 1” (yup, the Spice Girls) that didn’t suck. Here, he goes mostly acoustic, letting his somgwriting and vocal harmonies shine. And if you’re looking for a real treat, track seven has it — an all-acoustic guitar version of Genesis’ classic “The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway.” Yes, including the keyboard intro. If you have any appreciation of guitar technique, you will be left in the smoking ruins of your ability.

Yes, Yngwie, I’m talking to you.

A few other things to try, if you’re alone at home on a rainy Thursday with too much free space on your credit card: Dark Suns – Existence (gotta love those Europeans); Pain of Salvation – Be; Jellyfish – Spilt Milk (an oldie but a goodie); the Exhibit(s) – One Possible Outcome of Attraction (I’m such a whore — available for free download at www.averyellis.com); and Echobrain – Glean (Neil Young and the Kinks meet Radiohead).

All of these are available at Amazon, among other places. Now, stop wasting your week – go buy a new disc, something you’ve never heard. It’ll make your ears happy. And if you think you can, recommend me something I’ve never heard before. It won’t be easy, but if you can pull it off — and it’s something that I like — I’ll make it worth your while. Free prizes to the seventh caller, or somesuch.